Listen, simple ain't easy. Here's a simple truth that's hard as hell.
I believe it's possible to learn to change how you see any situation. And by changing how you see something, you can change how you feel about it.
One day I got sick of getting bullied, and I decided to do something about it. I decided that no matter what those kids did to me, I would never let them get to me. I replaced my fear with a steely resolve.
I don't believe you can control your feelings. In intense situations, you have to feel something. But with practice, you can choose what feeling is most useful.
A steely resolve is a feeling. Compassionate, but focused is a feeling. Absurd black comedy is a feeling. The dedication of a commited parent.
You can learn how to change how you see a situation.
My brother passed away. He had complications from chemotherapy and died from an infection inside his heart. It was a gruesome, horrific, slow death. I was by his side in the ICU the whole time.
I'm not glad he died. But I have learned to be grateful. His death taught me lessons I deeply needed to learn.
You can learn how to change.
You can change how you feel.